A few years ago a woman called wanting to schedule a funeral for her husband on the following Saturday. It was early in the week but it’s not too unusual to have families that wish to wait until the weekend to hold a service.  It gives some folks the opportunity to attend that might otherwise have to miss due to work or travel requirements.  It was a little concerning that we did not have a death call on the individual in question but, again, that’s not too unusual.  There are times we are called by the family before the hospital or nursing home finishes processing their paperwork.   So we started our side of the conversation by explaining that we had not been contacted regarding his death—our intention being to follow that statement with the question, “Where is your husband now?”—but she interrupted with the news that he was not yet dead.

I beg your pardon?

He had not yet died but the doctors assured her he wouldn’t last the week and she wanted to be certain she could hold his funeral on Saturday. At 1:00 P.M.  In the chapel.

Oh, my.

It was difficult to explain to her that we could not reserve a funeral time for someone who was not dead because she was so absolutely certain he would be in sufficient time to attend his service. As it turned out, he was not.  As a matter of fact, he defied the doctors and lived for several weeks beyond his allotted time frame.

Which is the entire point. No one knows when Death will come to call.  Doctors cannot predict his arrival.  Families cannot plan in advance for the exact moment.  Because Death doesn’t own a watch.  His timing is his own and no one has been able to coerce him into following any kind of schedule other than one of his choosing.

I always liked the commercial for a particular medical center where the patient is recounting what her doctor told her, “I don’t see an expiration date stamped on the bottom of your foot.” That doctor was absolutely right and it’s something we all must remember.  We may not know the hour or the day or even the year, but we do know that a visit from the Grim Reaper is eventual and inevitable.  That doesn’t mean we should live in fear but it does mean we should be prepared.  And that preparation comes in many different forms.  Most of us who have survived beyond our teenage years understand that, and we generally don’t need someone giving us a to-do list for Death.  The problem is not a failure to understand but a failure to act.  Perhaps it’s a belief that we can do it “tomorrow”.  Perhaps it’s an unreasonable fear that acknowledging the inevitable will hasten its arrival.  And some people are so afraid of Death that they simply refuse to contemplate their own mortality.

Whether it’s procrastination or panic that prevents you from acting, we all know there’s no time like the present to put a metaphorical house in order—because the present is the only time we’re guaranteed. So for their sake and your sake and our sake, please don’t leave your family in the dark when it comes to their future without you.  Believe me, they may thank you for it now, but they will be eternally grateful when that day finally comes.

The post He Doesn’t Own a Watch appeared first on Shackelford Funeral Directors | Blog.