After eight long years of managing not to leave town for any extended periods of time, my daughter convinced me to go on a “girls’ trip”.  Various destinations were proposed and Williamsburg, Virginia was finally the agreed upon choice.  That seemed to be more restful than Disney World (which I dearly LOVE but I didn’t have time for a vacation after my vacation so I could recover) and less time consuming that flying across the country to some inn on the cell-serviceless coast of Oregon where each room is themed after a famous author (I would have chosen the Arthur Conan Doyle room ‘cause, of course, Sherlock Holmes).

As I began to prepare for our departure I also began to realize why I had avoided leaving town for the last eight years.  There was SO MUCH STUFF that had to be done, or taken care of, or finalized, or whatevered before I could run away.  And it wasn’t just work stuff.  Things had to be ready for the kindergarten class that I teach at church each Wednesday night (except for this one), ALL the laundry had to be done so I would have clothes to pack.  Oh . . . and packing.  There had to be packing . . . all the packing.  Fortunately, not as much packing as for some other trips since this one required one pair of nicer pants and a multitude of blue jeans.  Exactly my kinda trip.

But it was the work stuff that almost did me in.  I had a to-do list a mile long with everything timed to the minute as to how it could all be accomplished.  Unfortunately, the minutes ticked off much faster than the items on the list and, one by one, those lowest in priority just dropped off completely.

As I scurried around, trying to prepare for the end of life as I knew it—at least for a week—I just stopped and sat down.  I had reached a point where my frustration level was through the roof because life—and death—just kept interfering with everything I was trying to accomplish.  If anyone had so much as looked at me wrong I would have either burst into tears or eaten them alive.  The direction taken would have depended upon the moment.

As stressful as it was (for me anyway) to prepare for a less than one week trip, there are journeys that require far more effort and induce far more stress.  Unfortunately, the preparations for that much longer, more permanent departure are often left undone by everyone involved.

Setting aside any spiritual considerations, there are so many directions that observation can take.  Are we discussing the one leaving or those who will be left behind?  Is the journey imminent or simply being contemplated as a part of life?  If you are the one departing there are matters which only you can finalize.  Do you need a will?  If so, do you have a will?  If not, why in the world not?  Are powers of attorney in place so folks can act on your behalf should you reach a point where you no longer can?  Have arrangements been made so your family will be able to cover your funeral expenses and any other bills you may have?  Those things and so many more can be taken care of if you have the time, but too many people wait until it’s too late to plan, too late to prepare for the inevitable.

Now, if you’re one of those who will be left behind, your preparations will take a completely different path.  Your greatest adjustment will come in accepting the inevitable and then finding your way in life after Death comes to call—and honestly, there isn’t much way to prepare for either of those.  Unfortunately, depending upon your relationship to the traveler there can be so much more required of you than just coping.  There may be a home to empty, paperwork to process, family matters to settle.  As a matter of fact, there may be SO MUCH STUFF that you simply get lost in it all.

No one has to travel any of these paths alone.  There may be other family members and friends who can make the journey with you.  There are professionals who can assist you in every area, whether it’s an insurance agent, attorney, funeral director, or grief counselor.  And, although you may not realize it, that last one can help everyone involved, including the one facing Death.  If you don’t think that person grieves, too, then you need to think again.

I believed a week would surely be enough time to wrap up loose ends, pack a suitcase or two (disclaimer—the photo accompanying this post is not representative of my luggage), and literally fly away for a week.  And I was wrong.  Don’t let the most important trip—the truly inevitable trip—catch you by surprise.  I knew my plane left at 7:00 AM on Sunday morning.  That gift of certainty isn’t ours where Death is concerned.  Take the time now to be sure your family isn’t left in a mess when you leave.  Take the time now to be prepared.

The post Be Prepared appeared first on Shackelford Funeral Directors | Blog.