Slipping Away

Lisa Thomas • April 6, 2022

Last week the family of actor Bruce Willis announced he was stepping away from the career he loved due to health issues.  The 67 year old star of the “Die Hard” franchise and a plethora of other action films too numerous to list here, had been diagnosed with aphasia, a cognitive disorder that  affects a person’s ability to speak, read, and write—basically, to comprehend and communicate.

Aphasia afflicts approximately 1,000,000 people in the United States and is often caused by strokes or other triggers such as brain tumors or infections and severe blows to the head—but it can also stem from dementia or Alzheimer’s.  The disease is progressive, meaning eventually Willis will be left unable to communicate or to understand language in any form.  In other words, he will be locked inside a body that still functions but with no cognitive ability.

As with so many who suffer from such illnesses, Willis’s family, friends, and co-workers had begun to notice the changes years before the diagnosis.  Accommodations were made as he tried to continue acting . . . scripts were shortened . . . body doubles were used more frequently . . . and eventually directors began declining to work with him, not because of any hesitancy over his limitations but out of respect for the actor and a desire to protect his entertainment legacy.

Robin Williams’s family faced the same unknown for several years, but theirs came with a misdiagnosis, as is common with his illness.  Diffuse Lewy Body Dementia mimics other diseases such as Parkinson’s, a label erroneously attached to Williams’s condition in its early stages.  Lewy Body Dementia brings with it a whole list of symptoms including paranoia, hallucinations, confusion, and insomnia, all of which result in a blurring of the lines between fantasy and reality—and made it impossible for Williams to continue performing.  So great was the depression brought about by his illness and mental decline that he ultimately took his own life.  It was only in the results of his autopsy that the answers were found, because that is the only way to definitively diagnose Lewy Body Dementia—by autopsying the brain.

As with aphasia caused by dementia or Alzheimer’s, a diagnosis of Diffuse Lewy Body Dementia is a slowly evolving death sentence.  There are no cures.  There are no treatments.  And there is no hiding the effects.  Although the world was never privy to the private struggles of these two well-known actors, those closest to them witnessed their decline . . . and were left to wonder why.

For every celebrity who suffers from an illness that ravages their mind, there are millions of ordinary people who are equally afflicted—people whose names are not known to the world, but who still matter greatly to those who love them and are forced to watch as they slip away.  It is a truly helpless feeling to stand beside someone who was once vibrantly alive but now does not recognize your face or even respond to their own name.  And in the end the cause doesn’t really matter; the result is still the same.  They will die twice and nothing you can do will change that.  So while they can still recall their own histories and retell their stories, record those memories.  Ask all the questions and glean all the information you can.  Then someday, when they no longer know who they are, you can remind them—and yourself.

 

About the author:  Lisa Shackelford Thomas is a fourth generation member of a family that’s been in funeral service since 1926.  She has been employed at Shackelford Funeral Directors in Savannah, Tennessee for over 40 years and currently serves as the manager there.  Any opinions expressed here are hers and hers alone, and may or may not reflect the opinions of other Shackelford family members or staff.

By Lisa Thomas May 21, 2025
For the past several years I’ve taken the week before Memorial Day to focus on a few members of our military who lived in our area—and who gave their lives in service to our country.
By Lisa Thomas May 15, 2025
My maternal grandmother was a fiercely independent soul, having been born and raised on a farm in the New Hope community of rural Hardin County, Tennessee. She made up for her lack of travel experiences by marrying my grandfather who worked for TVA during their years of dam construction across the southern United States.
By Lisa Thomas May 8, 2025
It was late one Saturday afternoon when the guests gathered beneath the boughs of an ancient oak. They had come to celebrate the beginning of a life together for two young people they all knew and loved, but before the ceremony began with the official seating of the grandparents and parents of the bride and groom, a woman walked down the aisle, carrying sunflowers which she gently laid in a chair at the front.
By Lisa Thomas May 1, 2025
The crowd was tremendous, numbering in the tens of thousands, and all willing to wait the almost eight hours it could take to reach their destination. And the vast majority of them came armed with cell phones and the occasional selfie stick.
By Lisa Thomas April 23, 2025
As a child I always had a love-hate relationship with Easter. I loved the egg hunts we had at school, walking to a nearby classmate’s home and searching for the elusive eggs scattered about the yard. I wasn’t crazy about being required to dress up for the church service—mainly because I wasn’t crazy about being required to dress up for much of anything.
By Lisa Thomas April 17, 2025
When a family comes to the funeral home to make arrangements for someone they have loved and lost, they come bearing much more than clothes and a picture for the memorial folder. They just don’t always realize it.
By Lisa Thomas April 9, 2025
If you were allowed to live a normal, rough-and-tumble childhood, then you probably have the scars to show for your adventures. I know I do.
By Lisa Thomas April 3, 2025
It was one of those nights when his daddy had to work late, and our youngest grandchild Malcolm was upset because he wouldn’t be home for their normal bedtime routine.
By Lisa Thomas March 27, 2025
Nick and Christina married on July 4th and every year thereafter celebrated with a big cake covered in sparklers. Nick owned a Greek restaurant and the cook there knew that each July 4th, that cake was not only expected but greatly anticipated. So, it concerned Christina when her husband began asking about the cake more than a month away from their anniversary . . .
By Lisa Thomas March 19, 2025
As best we can tell, she adopted us in December of 2022. Not that we minded. We were coming off of two very difficult years and this little furball proved to be the bright spot we needed.
More Posts